Recruits Review

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Director: Kristopher Weston
Reviewed by: Emo Ferrengi
7/27/2004 comments link

In Recruits, Falcon Lifetime Exclusive Matthew Rush (Ready for More, Hazed) is an amalgam of different types and features. He's got the full, red lips of a sweet young pretty-boy. His eyes look slightly Asian, with what appear to be epicanthic folds (if you look close.)

He's got sun-soaked golden skin and perky brown nipples that could be a white boy's or could be ethnic. And he's got the body of an actual bodybuilder - for reals. On the cover of Recruits, there's a whistle hanging between his pecs, and it look like it's fallen into a canyon. I bet he could pick things up with those pecs as a parlor trick, the way some people do with their ass cheeks.

But moving on to the movie. These "Recruits" live in a barracks where the walls are painted in camouflage, presumably to confuse the enemy. Old timer Gus Mattox (Kept - he's aged very well) - polishes his boots as fellow soldier (and cleft lip victim) Tyler Gunn (Quarterback Sack, Drenched II) strolls in with half a stiffy, drying off from the shower. I'm assuming these showers, off-screen, are a little sexier than the ones in M*A*S*H, with no Alan Alda.

Gunn is soon blowing the thick-armed and tattooed Mattox, to garner more information about the interrogation process at "boot camp". "I heard some guy had a full body cavity search last time!" naive Gunn comments. Somehow, I get the impression it was more a "search and destroy."

Gunn returns the favor with a tolerable blowjob and a more-than-tolerable rimming. Gunn has such smooth, clear skin I'd love to know his beauty secret - or maybe just run my tongue all over him to find out. Mattox seems to thoroughly enjoy the hard riding that Gunn gives his cock. Gunn's got the flexibility and limberness of a pole dancer, and it all seems to be focused around his ass. The way Mattox looks at Gunn, their scene together seems totally "for real" and I have no doubt both enjoyed it.

Next scene: Gus Mattox and Alex Lemonde in the forest for a training mission. Strange (to me) that, for an American soldier, Lemonde has an extremely thick (French?) foreign accent. But no matter. The tension in this mission is that "the loser will be shipped off to the Middle East!" Brad Patton makes his first appearance in this scene, with a genuine military obedience to Lemonde and a bubble ass that even military-issue fatigues can't contain.

Patton is belligerent when quickly captured by Matthew Rush and bulky Joe Sport - "Eat out my ass!" he shouts. "Wrong answer!" Rush orders, and smacks him hard. Though Rush has the Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen-esque habit of spitting out his lines so they're incomprehensible, he's certainly better looking than they are (in a guy-on-guy kind of way) so all is forgiven. "All right, then suck my cock!" Patton responds.

Surprisingly, Patton is able to knock out the much-bigger Rush with a single karate kick, then turn around and yank Sport's fatigues to the floor. Maybe ass-eating is something Sport has never before experienced in his military career, since he quickly stops objecting and even sticks his ass out for more. He's soon dutifully sucking Patton's veiny horsedick, set off by two great nuts that lift and separate all on their own like magic. It's like Stockholm Syndrome in reverse.

Rush wakes up with a concussion, or that's what I'm assuming since he goes and warmly puts his arm around Patton and pulls his sizeable tool out for Sport to suck as well. Rush is truly genetically gifted. I'd need some delay cream to go more than five minues with him in any role. Especially hot is Patton-sucking-Sport-sucking-Rush. Good times.

Little do these folks know they're being watched - by the Sergeant (Lemonde)! He's impressed by how Patton has turned the tables - "Jesus, he's got balls!" Lemonde says. "Wait until they're done," he orders an underling, "then bring them to my quarters!" Well by the time they're done, Rush has pounded Patton's ass (turning the tables once again) to such a state I'd say he's been punished enough. Best cum shot in this scene: definitely the handsomely uncut Patton.

The next scene is a vertiable feast of fatigues, and if you like camouflage (I do!) you'll love the various shades of green as the rest of the all-star cast - Alex Lemonde, Jon Galt, Joe Sport, Chet Roberts, and others - all join in.

If this is the Army, you don't even need to ask - I sure won't tell!

 Buy Recruits at FalconStudios.Com
 Full movie trailers, image galleries on FalconXXX.Com


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