Be A Man Review

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Be A ManUnzipped Video
Director: Chi Chi LaRue
Reviewed by: R Hewlett
5/18/2005 comments link


Chi Chi LaRue is without a doubt the most prolific and talented director in gay porn today, perhaps ever, and her/his legacy continues to grow with each new release. Be A Man, from Unzipped Video, is LaRue's latest feature starring some of gay porn's finest studs du jour.

One of the things I love about Chi Chi is that she doesn't skimp on the blowjob scenes like nearly every other studio porn does (with a few exceptions.) In scene one of Be A Man, incredibly cute Jason Hawke pairs up with lean, muscular Claudio Martin, where they spend the first 20 minutes trading blow jobs and eating ass. Jason is quite a skilled cocksucker, as you might expect, handling Claudio's thick meat with aplomb, but it's Claudio who obviously excels in this department. When he plunges his head vigorously up and down and back and forth on Jason's stiff dick, Jason's huffs and puffs are genuine. The sound of Claudio's sloppy, frenzied cock-slurping coupled with brief cutaway shots of his massive member flopping and wagging in close-up add a touch of nastiness to the scene and it works quite well.

This bit eventually dissolves into the inevitable wild pony ride, with Jason bucking and flailing on top, followed by the finale, a Twister acrobatics butt scene where Jason's legs are thrown over his head with his ass up in the air as Claudio squat-fucks him from above. This particular position serves Jason's cum shot exceedingly well, allowing him to spew his load in his own pretty face — well, actually it dribbles down his neck like gobs of big, wet pearls, but close enough.

Scene Two begins with sexy Sebastian Tauza down on all fours in a men's room surrounded by Army grunts, big bad Rob Romoni and ultra-cute Rascal Video Exclusive Theo Blake, both clad only in tighty-whities and black boots. At first, Romoni acts on his mean green instincts, insisting that Private Sebastian clean his boots — without using his hands. Of course, Sebastian obeys, and that's when the licking begins (lucky for Sebastian, Rob's boots are brand new with not a speck of dirt to be found — perhaps they'd already been cleaned by Theo earlier?)

Seeing the potential for putting Sebastian's pretty mouth to good use, Theo interrupts the boot-shining business and suggests maybe they're being too "hard" on the poor boy. At this point, Sebastian is instead offered his choice of cock to suck. Still kneeling, he looks back and forth from one crotch to the other as if he can't decide whose to pick. Since Rob already has his big meaty boy out of his briefs and it's already stiff as a board, Sebastian chooses to wrap his mouth around Rob's. As aptly as he can swallow cock, it's clear that Sebastian is an ass boy all the way, because it's mainly when Theo or Rob are licking, tickling or otherwise puncturing Sebastian's hole that he really comes to life... and rest assured, when his perky little butt gets fucked, the cum does fly.

Scene Three features butch, hairy "hardhats" Collin O'Neal and Troy Punk. First of all, let me say that if they bottled these boys' ball sweat, I'd buy a year's supply and take a bath in it. I don't know exactly what it is, but there's something irresistably smarmy about both these two, an animal sex appeal that makes them watchable no matter how many times I've seen them fuck on camera. This scene starts off with some mutual frottage, and evolves into Collin's titillating treatment of Troy's turgid cock. Troy loves it when Collin teases him, and his dirty talk is spontaneous and hot.

When the tables turn, Collin parks himself on top of a garbage can, in an extreme spread eagle pose, allowing Troy easy access to the garden of manly delights that flourishes between his legs. Troy buries his face in Collin's butt, licks his pretty asshole (which twitches appreciatively in response) and of course, he chows down on Collin's ridiculously big cock. Personally, I could go on watching these two suck each other for about a week and a half, but the main attraction here is to be the jackhammer butt pounding Troy Punk receives as observed from every conceivable camera angle, while he yelps in heated ecstasy — 34 "fuck yeah's" and counting.

I especially enjoyed watching Troy bounce up and down on Collin's cock while wearing his orange hard hat. While Collin in the background seems to enjoy the action enough, there's no question this scene belongs to Troy Punk, and his cum shot, in which he beats off with Collin's dick shoved down his throat, is sensational, making the little hairs on my ears stand up. Collin reciprocates by blowing a geyser of cum out in all directions, which should have been replayed in slow-mo close-up as far as I'm concerned. Luckily, I've got buttons on my remote to do that.

Scene Four stars Alex LeMonde as a boxing trainer and Rascal Video Exclusive Patrick Downs as his beaten, bruised trainee. Downs has apparently just lost a fight and LeMonde isn't too happy about it, probably because his boy has suffered a black eye and LeMonde doesn't like seeing such a pretty face all messed up. On the other hand, Downs looks pretty sexy with a shiner, and soon, LeMonde is making Downs feel all better by offering up his gigantic dick for a suck. LeMonde owns one of the most suckable cocks I've ever seen in my life. It's big, long, thick, perfectly shaped, and I admit I want it badly. So does Patrick Downs, who manages to deep throat the monster all the way to the short hairs over and over and over, without once flinching, gagging, or even stopping to take a breath. This boy must have had his uvula surgically removed. Indeed, the ease with which Downs handles LeMonde's meat comes as a surprise to LeMonde himself who at one point looks astonished and delighted by Downs performance.

The wild sucking goes on for quite some time — no complaints about that — culminating in the finale buttfuck scene with Downs hosting LeMonde's giant meat javelin. LeMonde impales boxer boy with such exquisite vigor and for such a prolonged period of time, I felt sure that the squeaky bench they were jamming on would collapse any second. The cum is eventually hurled in all directions, and it's a toss up whose orgasmic grimaces and shreaks are more intense. Who came hardest? We may never know.

Cast: Jason Hawke, Claudio Martin, Rob Romoni, Theo Blake, Sebastian Tauza, Collin O'Neal, Troy Punk, Alex LeMonde, Patrick Downs

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